As Christians, once you follow someone online, you’re not supposed to unfollow them.
Pretty sure that’s in Psalms. Message version. Go ahead, Google it.
Regardless, you shouldn’t do it. It’s awkward. It hurts feelings, and it’s not one of the fruits of the spirit. Again, playing a little fast and loose with Scripture. But you show me where the word “Twitter” is in the Bible, and I’ll stop making stuff up.
But there are moments when it’s completely OK to unfollow or unfriend someone on social media. Here they are:
1. They get a puppy.
You will love the first 42 puppy photos. You will hate 43 through infinity. When your friend gets a dog named “Sir Slobberton the 5th,” it’s time to cut them loose.
2. They get a cat.
Don’t even give them a one photo waiting period. Cut them. Cut them fast. The problem is that we’ve all grown so accustomed to the many hilarious cats the Internet has to offer. You know what the average cat isn’t? Hilarious. Your friend’s cat isn’t going to ride an invisible bike, like below. They’re just going to sit there, dominating your Instagram feed with their averageness. Let them go.
3. They get engaged.
No one posts photos online like a newly engaged couple. These two…these two invented love. Hugs, kisses, handwritten notes written in their own tears…it’s a bit much eventually. Drop them unless you can wait until after the wedding. Why? It’s a scientific fact that once someone gets married they take 82% less photos of each other having tickle fights. True story.
That’s it. Those are the three reasons you can unfollow someone in Christian love. Otherwise, if you do, you have to go find them and apologize with an ox. It gets tricky when you mix OT and NT and IT.
Have you ever unfollowed someone? If so, why?