Asking people to “scoot to the middle” in church.
There are two types of people in the world, those who will sit in a seat that’s not theirs at an event and those who won’t.
I am in the “won’t” category. If I have tickets for the nosebleed section at a concert, that’s where I sit. I can’t sneak down front and sit in better seats without constantly thinking the rightful owner of that seat is about to show up at any moment. And he’s probably an Ultimate Fighter with his concealed weapon permit.
Plus, when you get caught you have to pretend you didn’t know you’re $10 tickets didn’t permit you to sit on the front row. “Wait a second, this is row #1? Let me look at my ticket. Oh, would you look at that! I’m in row #1,000. Simple mistake on my part. Whoops!”
I can’t do it. I can’t be that guy, which is why I like the seating arrangement at most churches. No one has a ticket. Each Sunday morning is a seat free for all. And it all comes to a head when the pastor says one thing:









