I’m not a huge Twitter guy, but I am starting to enjoy it. It’d be cool if you followed me, click here to do so. (I’m @prodigaljohn) If you’re a fan of mirth, here is stuff I tweeted in the last two weeks.
Somewhere right now, Whatzit, the horrible Atlanta Olympics mascot, is drunk and crying watching closing ceremonies
I think the Olympics just played Canada’s version of “Party in the USA.” I feel like we should both be ashamed.
Smoke just came out of the energy drink I bought. That’s either awesome or terrifying. Or both.
Just dropped my GPS on taco bell bathroom floor. Thought British lady voice was going to say, “Turn left, I hate you.”
Sometimes I worry about the News. Huey can take care of himself but the News needs to be thought about more often.
For the longest time, I thought Travis Tritt and the lead singer from Third Day were the same person.
Your pursuit of your dreams is often seen as a direct insult to people who are terrified of their own.
Girl on American Idol said her audition was “spiritual.” Ohhh tricky, could mean she loves Jesus or yoga.
“Only drink coffee when necessary.” A “cost saving idea” someone submitted at work to lower budget. Worst. Idea. Ever.
If they combined ski jumping & biathlon so you could shoot the jumpers with rubber bullets, the whole planet would watch
How was ski jumping invented? It defies everything natural your body wants to do. My guess? Booze was involved.
Nothing good ever follows the phrase, “Effective immediately:” It’s never, “Effective immediately, you’re really pretty.”
