#603. Prayer Walks

I’ve prayed before while walking but I’ve never been on an official “prayer walk.” I’m not sure what exactly makes them official, perhaps a hat or a map of the place you’re going to pray through. It’s hard to tell because people have different definitions of what a prayer walk includes, but for some people it includes what is known as a “vacation.”

I say that because someone I know went on a mission trip prayer walk in Rome, Italy. Before you send in your support letters and offer up a hedge of protection for them, let me first and foremost say that fear not, they returned safely months ago.

That’s the kind of mission trip that makes me a little cynical. When I hear about trips like that, the grumpy old man inside me kicks over the rocking chair on his metaphorical front porch and wants to ghost ride his rascal scooter off a cliff after using some World War II era profanities at some neighborhood street youths.

But who am I to judge when a prayer walk is a mission trip and when it’s just a nice chance to walk through an amazing city while also occasionally praying when you’re not buying fine leather belts? It’s not like there’s a helpful questionnaire that allows you to determine if someone is a missionary or a vacationary …

Read more after the jump

Missionary or Vacationary?

1. Where are you going?
A. To a country that people regularly honeymoon in, retire in or go on “shell collecting excursions” in.
B. To a country that last saw a tourist in 1987.

2. How many personal suitcases are you bringing?
A. The entire team is sharing one so I’ll be required to wear all the clothes I want to bring on the plane. I’ll have five pairs of pants on at once.
B. Whichever matching set I feel best complements the native flora and fauna.

3. How many bathing suits are you packing?
A. None, there’s not an ocean or there won’t be any time to swim.
B. As many as I can fit in my suitcases.

4. How many shots do you have to get beforehand?
A. At least 14.
B. Ouchie, no thanks.

5. If you’ll be doing a prayer walk, where will you be walking?
A. Through the Kibera slums in Kenya.
B. By the Pantheon, the Trevi fountain and hopefully the Sistine Chapel. Fingers crossed!

6. What’s your greatest worry about the trip?
A. I can’t pick just one. Probably malaria or that civil unrest would break out with a government coup started inevitably by a General that has a really thick mustache.
B. Wicked bad sunburn from not getting enough of a base tan before we leave.

7. Can you drink the water?
A. No. If we boil it and then run it through a filter system and then dissolve these charcoal tablets in it we can use it to wash our hands. But drink? No.
B. Yes, and it will be sparkling. Probably Pellegrino if I had to guess.

8. What will the reaction of friends and family members be when you get back?
A. “I’m so glad you made it home safely!”
B. “Did you get me a souvenir? Did you remember I am a size medium t-shirt?”

9. If you post photos of the trip on Facebook, what will people write in the comments?
A. “I prayed for your safety! Are you sure you should be posting photos that mention the location like that? I thought that country had serious issues with Christians being there?”
B. “I love that place! We’re going next summer for vacation! Staying at a Sandals!”

10. Did anything about the trip leave an impression on you?
A. “Yes, a small knife that a street thug used to cut my fanny pack off left a scar on my lower back. Will never forget that.”
B. “Yes, the food. I ate a piece of caper glazed sea bass that danced on my tongue like Michael Flatley, the Lord of the Dance.

If you answered A to the majority of those questions, then congratulations, you’re a prayer walking missionary. My younger brother for instance goes on regular prayer walks through the neighborhood he and his wife live in located in East Nashville. They pick up trash along the way and given the homicides and gang violence are prayed up long before they walk out their front door. If you answered B to the majority of those questions, then congratulations you’re a prayer walking vacationary.

Please just know that if you send me a support letter I am going to call your “if you can’t give money, please just give prayers” bluff and send you back many, many prayers. I’ll save some for me too though because I am sinning in my heart right this second.