I am what the Dutch call “web dumb.” When people email and ask how they can subscribe to Stuff Christians Like, how they can get an RSS feed or get the posts via email my usual response is “So, the webscapes can do that now? Far out!”

Seriously, let’s look at my online track record:
1. The domain name for this site was taken so I registered a new name with a typo in it.
2. Not understanding Twitter, I register myself as “ProdigalJohn.” Only my name is Jon, so that’s kind of a typo and a guarantee that none of my friends can search for me.
3. On facebook, I decide to go with “Jonathan Christopher” as my name creating further confusion. (That’s my first name and middle name.)
4. I allow a 1957 Chevy dealer to take the .com version of this website.

All in all, I find that I tend to have the web skills of an 1840’s prospector.

That’s why when it came to redesign this site I hired an expert named John Saddington. It’s also why when the church I attend, North Point Community Church, announced they were starting an online church I was completely confused. I clearly want to seem postmodern and relevant so when I heard they were launching northpointonline.tv I had two choices:

1. I could nod my head and pretend I understood what online church was all about. (This is a technique I often do in conversations so that I don’t look stupid.)

2. I could ask a bunch of questions.

Faking it is kind of exhausting and would make for a really boring post, so I decided to go with option number 2 and ask a bunch of questions.

Since North Point often sends out emails called, “A note from Andy Stanley” (the pastor of my church) I thought I would address the questions directly to him. (This is horrible, but every time I see the subject line “A note from Andy” in my inbox, I think to myself, “Andy finally emailed me! I bet he wants me to go on tour with him and Craig Groeschel, or maybe play flag football with him and Rick Warren or at the bare minimum he’s agreed to endorse the Stuff Christians Like book!”)

So here are my questions for Andy Stanley about online churches, or maybe they’re for you if you’re smarter than me about the whole online church movement:

1. If I’m watching a sermon online and I open up another window and answer some emails at the same time, is that a sin? Isn’t that the cyber equivalent of doodling in your bulletin? If I have a really big monitor, does that change your answer?

2. What if the emails are from people I’m in a Bible Study with, so technically speaking, I’m participating in fellowship? Ohh curveball.

3. Do I have to stand up when the worship leader calls us to our feet?

4. If I don’t like the worship songs that day, can I DJ myself with some songs I like from iTunes?
5. If I have a bad connection or the wrong version of flash or my computer crashes, is it safe to assume that I can blame that on the devil? If so, can I put him on notice?

6. How long can I pause the sermon, go do chores/answer the phone/find more comfortable socks to wear etc. and then come back without it seeming like I’ve left church?

7. There are only two occasions in which I wear a belt: A business meeting at work where I want to look smart and church. Do I have to wear a belt to attend online church?

8. Is it weird if I’m still shy about singing with my hands raised during online church? Should I still be doing the ninja in my own home? Is that something a counselor can help me with?

9. If I watch the sermon on a podcast, do you mind if I fast forward through the first few minutes of the sermon where you recap last week’s message for the people that weren’t there?

10. Someone once told me they consider eating at Chick-Fil-A to be tithing. Now that I’m using my computer to attend church, can I consider a new Mac purchase to be like one big, silvery cool tithe?

11. Will you please not cut off the podcast before or in the middle of the closing prayer? People at home like closing prayers too. (I’m talking to you Matt Chandler.)

12. Is there anyway that you could create a frame around the video player that has a graphic of someone giving someone else a back massage during church, someone coughing and the heads of the tall family I inevitably manage to sit behind every Sunday so that the experience will feel more authentic?

Those are the questions I have for Andy Stanley. And for you.

Does your church have an online version?

Would you have asked something different than me?

What do you do online when it comes to church? Blogs? Podcasts? Video sermons?

Are you currently doing anything church related online?

So many questions!

Sometimes when I think about life change, I get a little bummed out. I imagine a 782 step process, a mountain of challenges and obstacles and to do lists that feel heavy and impossible.

(If you ever read the comments on Stuff Christians Like, which I continue to contend are often funnier/more insightful than the original post, you’re familiar with Jarrod Haggard. For months he’s been a daily, fantastic contributor to the conversation we’re all having and a few weeks ago he even agreed to sit in for a guest post. It’s a straight satire about how we often abuse and misuse and confuse our prayer requests. Enjoy.)

The Sales Pitch Prayer Request or
How To Get Whatever You Ask For in Prayer – by Jarrod Haggard

A while ago I had to drive several hours every day for my job. Most days I listened to a Christian radio station…let’s call it B-loved. The deejay was a great guy, let’s call him Mark. At 3:30 every afternoon Mark would take the day’s prayer requests and mash them together into an epic fifteen minute prayerathon. I enjoyed this opportunity to pray, but I really loved the lesson I learned from Mark about the art of getting prayers answered.

One day, in the middle of the prayerathon, Mark brought forth a moment of awesome so grand in scale that it changed my attitude towards prayer forever. It went a little something like this…

“…and Lord, I just want to take a second and lift up my own prayer request to you. I ask that you please help with my car situation. Father, I am still trying to sell my blue ’96 Honda Accord…with only 56,000 miles, new tires, no dents, and all the service records. God, I’m only asking $7,500 or best offer for it, and I would love it if you, in your wisdom, would lead someone to contact me here at the station if they’re interested…”

Yes, I can put it in quotes because you don’t forget a prayer like that…ever. Those simple words, echoed into the ears of thousands, altered my prayer life completely. I realized that I had missed one of the greatest opportunities ever presented to people that pray in groups.

So, in true SCL fashion, here are the three steps that you can take to finally get whatever you ask for in prayer.

1. Find as many groups as possible.
Sunday night prayer meeting. Wednesday night bible study. Tuesday morning prayer breakfast. The more people the better. Home groups are especially helpful, and most of them are divided by region. So if no one knows exactly where you live, you could go to a home group every night of the week! What you want is an audience. If you’re good-looking, get on T.V. If you have a pleasant voice, get on the radio. If you’re witty and irreverent, post a lot of comments on a popular blog.

2. Endear yourself to the people around you.
Be just.like.them. Do they have kids? Borrow your nieces and nephews, or use the stock photos that came with your wallet. Are they college age? Wear flip-flops and a Castro hat. Are they retired? Learn to love buffets at 4 in the afternoon. Remember, Bob has no sense of personal space and will probably require a couple hugs per night. Jack, on the other hand, prefers handshakes. Learn their spouse’s names. Get familiar with their hobbies.

3. Know your audience.
College kids probably won’t buy the house you’re having trouble selling, but if you need to get your mom’s yard cleaned (like she’s been asking you to do for a month now), they’re your target. Need dental work? Try the home group in the upscale part of town. Tired of frozen dinners alone? Try the Older and Single (Again) group. Looking for a good place to invest? The Businessman’s Prayer Breakfast is where it’s at. Whatever your needs are, go to the people most likely to meet those needs.

Those are the three steps I recommend but what’s really of utmost importance is that you remember not to pray something like this; “Lord, please give me the strength to overcome my burdens, and to have faith that you will meet my needs in your time. Amen.”

Instead, when you pray, pray like this; “Dear God, I really need the water pump on my car fixed by a trustworthy mechanic who does really great work and may or may not have a shop downtown on 4th st. Lord, I can’t afford to pay for this, so I ask that you would lead someone into my life who might find it in their heart to help me for free, or at a greatly reduced rate because I can probably tell a lot of people about how great the work was and get way more business for him in the future. Father, I need this work done by Tom…morrow, if at all possible. Amen.”

This prayer method works like a charm. Sometimes though, people might just reach over and turn off the radio during the daily prayerathon, from that day forward.

(For more great stuff from Jarrod, check out his blog jarrodhaggard.blogspot.com)

Recently, a woman I know passed away. Days after what was a long battle with an illness was over, her boss, determined to cement his place in the “Worst Boss Ever” hall of fame, sent out an email to all her friends, family members and coworkers. In it he said,

“More than anything Susan would want us to continue working through what is the worst economic crisis this country and our company has faced. She would want us to push through this recession.”

When I get to heaven, I’m going to ask God at least two questions:
1. What was the deal with fire ants?
2. How did you not just continually strike that guy with lightning bolts all day long?

Seriously, that is the worst post death message I’ve ever heard. To use someone’s passing as a platform to move more sales of your product is unbelievable. And her boss sent out multiple rounds of that same idea, just to make sure the point was driven home.

Rumor has it that one day, I too, will die, but I’m not worried about an email like that circulating about me. I don’t fear that fate because as my friend Bruce reminded me, Christians excel at coming up with creative ways to say, “He died.” Like few people on the planet, we can eulogize the loss of a friend. And if I do go anytime soon, I hope you’ll pick one of these four popular methods to say “He’s dead.”:

1. “Heaven got a new football coach.”
I read this one the other day in a newspaper article and although it won’t fit perfectly for me or maybe you, the concept works. Whatever you were doing on earth just so happens to be something they needed in heaven and now you’ll be able to fulfill that role beyond the pearly white gates. In this case, the guy was a football coach, in my case, a sarcastic writer. Either way, it’s kind of funny because it calls to mind a bunch of angels sitting around on a field with some former NFL stars wishing they had a coach who could lead them through some drills. All of the sudden, poof, he’s there and the angels are finally able to practice and eventually play the demons that Frank Peretti created in his book “Facing the Darkness.” (The demon football team by the way uses the Raiders uniform and the angels are modeled after the New England Patriots. You’ll probably claim bias on my part since I’m from New England but I’m pretty sure that’s in the Bible.)

2. “He’s looking down on us from heaven.”
Based on what we say when someone passes away, heaven involves a lot of looking down. When you get up there, there’s just a big window back to earth and instead of TV, you just watch what the people you love are doing. If that’s true, I have to imagine that some of the people watching me, like my grandfather, are like people at a horror movie that yell at the screen. Instead of screaming, “Don’t open that closet,” my grandfather says things like, “Don’t take that job Jon! Stop thinking about money first. Write your second book instead of watching an MTV Real World marathon. Oh no, you are killing me.” He probably doesn’t say that last sentence, but I do have to confess that it feels a little egotistical to assume that when someone goes to heaven, one of the main activities they do is watch our lives. They’re in heaven. No offense, I’ll keep tabs on ya’ll with whatever sort of angelic Twitter they have in heaven but I have to believe there will be a majillionity other cool things to do in heaven that don’t involve me watching you go to the grocery store or file your taxes.

3. “He’s with his wife now.”
Although I’ve cleared my wife to marry someone who is shorter, less funny and less handsome than me should I die an early death, according to what many people say, she’ll come hang out with me when it’s all over. It’s very popular to imagine heaven like this bus depot where our loved ones are waiting for us to finally join them. Is that what heaven is like? Do all your buddies and family members that passed away before you make a welcome home banner that they hang from palm trees (my version of heaven is all palm trees) and then when you get there, they say, “That took forever, we’ve been trying to put together a foursome for Frisbie golf. Finally.” I don’t know about that one, tough call.

4. “He’s gone to a better place.”
One of my favorite things about being a Christian is that you never have to say the phrase, “It doesn’t get any better than this,” because it does. Even if you’re one of those people I see on the television show International House Hunters where they go look at three different houses in foreign locations like the Grand Caymans Islands and then buy one and say, “We love it here. We’re so glad we’re not a middle class copywriter living in Georgia who doesn’t get to tickle dolphins every morning when the sun wakes us up from our beds, which by the way, are hammocks woven of happiness.” Even if you’re that guy, it does get better. Heaven is better, and I’m a big fan of the simplicity of “He’s gone to a better place.”

I’m not sure what people will say after I die, hopefully it will be something from that list because those are my four favorite options.

But I promise I missed some.

What’s the best thing you’ve ever heard someone say after someone else passed away?

I think every Christian has a “Doesn’t Count List” (DCL), a collection of small things we do that might not be completely in God’s will for our life, but they’re so tiny they don’t really matter. If you say you don’t have a DCL, apparently lying is one of the items on yours because that’s just what you did.

Here are some things I recently realized were on my Doesn’t Count List:

Speeding
God is completely cool with this. I know we’re supposed to honor the authority we’re placed under, but God is like the state troopers on this one when it comes to driving faster than the legal limit, “Under 5 you’re fine, Over 5 you’re mine.”

Using the internet at work for personal reasons
Come on, I’m reading www.biblegateway.com and listening to podcasts of sermons. Surely God’s OK with me using time that my company pays me for that? I mean people take smoke breaks all day and I don’t smoke so I’m owed a few minutes of Internet break time here and there. I know that no matter what we do, we’re supposed to do it for the glory of God, which means working hard at work, but let’s be honest, that verse was written before Youtube, and that site has everything.

Doing things you wouldn’t recommend that other Christians do
I caught myself in this one last weekend. A friend sent me a link to a lil’ Wayne remix of Jason Mraz’ song “I’m yours” and it was awesome. I listened to it four or five times to make sure it was clean and then was about to tweet it from my twitter account when I thought, “Is that Christian of me to share that link? I mean it’s lil Wayne. I better not, I don’t want to recommend that other Christians listen to that.” But me? I’m apparently impervious to all sorts of less than holy forms of media. Me? I can handle that. (The second problem in that scenario is that by editing what I tweet but still listening to that song, I create a “twitter Jon” and a “real Jon.” I’m not sure if other Christian bloggers struggle with the temptation to “holy up” how they present themselves online but that is some whackness I need to get under control.)

Hook ups
If you thought I was going to talk about making out, you should be ashamed of yourself. I’m talking about the hook ups friends and family members can get us at stores. For instance, a few weeks ago when I decided to buy a mac laptop, they had a deal where if you were a college kid you could get a free iPod touch with the purchase and a free printer. I seriously considered finding a neighborhood kid to go in with me so that I could get the deal. And although I didn’t take advantage of that discount which honestly did not really apply to me, I’ve done that a number of times in the past.

Those are all pretty silly I guess. You could easily read my Doesn’t Count List and think, “Everybody does that. We can’t be perfect, what’s the big deal?” And you’d be right, we can’t be perfect, but what I’ve found in my own life is that the DCL is never satisfied with staying small and insignificant. It’s a hungry little list. It always wants more of your life. It always wants you to add new things to it. To grow and stretch until it’s a mile long.

When I was in college, I got into an unhealthy dating relationship. We were mutually bad for each other and our combined brokenness only managed to amplify the hurt we were able to cause. When my girlfriend got into techno music, so did I. When my girlfriend started going to raves, so did I. When my girlfriend started doing ecstasy, so did I. How?

I put it on my Doesn’t Count List.

After having years of practice adding “small things” to it and justifying why some things don’t count in God’s eyes, it was surprisingly easy to rationalize ecstasy. As I’ve written about before, in my head I told myself, “Cocaine is a real drug because you have to snort it. Heroin is a real drug because you have to shoot it. Pot is a real drug because you have to smoke it. Ecstasy is just a pill, like aspirin. I’ve swallowed pills before, that’s not a dangerous drug. That’s just a pill.”

As stupid as that sounds, when you’re living in stupid land, stupid decisions and stupid logic make a surprising amount of sense. So I started doing ecstasy. But that wasn’t enough for the DCL. So eventually I smoked some pot. And finally, in one of the scariest nights of my life, I did some acid. I kept adding to my “Doesn’t Count List” until it choked out all the good and made my life not count.

As gross as that all was, the bigger issue might be what keeping a DCL reveals I believe about God. Apparently, in my heart, God is still up in heaven keeping a massive list of things that count and things that don’t count. He’s Santa Claus and I’m a kid trying to hide the pieces of a broken vase under my bed in the hope that they don’t count. Christ’s death must not have been enough, because in my mind, there are still two lists going.

Let’s lose the lists. It all counts. If we could have been saved by a list, God wouldn’t have sent His son, He would have just given us more paper and pens so we could keep better lists. It has to count or Christ’s life doesn’t count. The grace, the mercy, the deep, beating heartbeat of hope from Christ beats loudly because it does count. The gap between me and God was wide and dark. But it was crossed.

Not by me.

Not by my goodness.

Not by lists.

But by Christ.

Because it counts.

I don’t think I’m alone in this. I don’t think I’m the only one holding a list in my hand sometimes. How about you? Have you ever had a Doesn’t Count List? What’s on it?

Dear Arch Rival Family at Church,

How did you do it?

Will you tell me your secrets now that we’re grown up and we’re not attending the same church? How were you able to be exactly like my family, only better? Did you know I considered you our arch rival family? Did you know that when we sat around the table for dinner your family was held up as the pinnacle of Christian servitude and discipline and awesomeness of all varieties?

I bet you didn’t. You were probably too busy helping orphan baby barn owls to notice my jealous glares. You were probably too busy donating your spare kidneys to strangers to know that secretly, the seventh grade version of me kept looking for some sign that you were a robot. Nobody could be that perfect!

But you were. When I was lazy and tried to pass a rainy Saturday afternoon in front of the television, my mom would say, “You know the arch rival kids are doing yard work for a crippled woman that lives in their neighborhood right now. In the rain. With their bare hands.”

And then I’d get up, go outside and kick a rake in the face out of frustration because somewhere across town you were winning. If I volunteered for something at church you had already volunteered for ten somethings. If I memorized one Bible verse you memorized the book of Philippians.

Was it Diet Rockstar? The can says it contains milk thistle, which I think is what Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh ate all the time which is confusing because he was so mellow, but it does promise to “provide an incredible energy boost for those whoe lead active and exhausting lifestyles – from athletes to rockstars.” Is that it? Were you hopped up on energy drinks, barely controlling the leg jitters from all the guarana coursing through you at all times? You can tell me. Unless the answer is “the fruit of the spirit.” Please don’t say that. I’ll definitely sin in my heart and probably my punching hand if that’s your response to my question of “what were you on?”

We’ve moved on haven’t we? I go to a church that’s too big for me to really develop a good Arch Rival Family, that curious family who seems to be the holier, more put together, more perfect version of your own. They’re never late to Sunday School. Their kids never have those kind of bruises and scrapes that make it look like you’re allowing them to play with bear cubs and jig saw blades at home. They never accidentally run out of regular yogurt for a casserole recipe and instead use vanilla yogurt which makes your chicken dish taste like a dessert and a main course got into a cat fight in which both parties lost.

So what was your secret? Mine was that I was really insecure and judgmental at the time, so even though you weren’t purposefully doing anything to attack my family, I definitely considered you a nemesis. Or a competitor in some weird church game. The whole thing makes no sense. Sorry about that.

But how about you? How did you do all those things you managed to do? It was Diet Rockstar, wasn’t it?

You can tell me.

Sincerely,

Jon

I’ve prayed before while walking but I’ve never been on an official “prayer walk.” I’m not sure what exactly makes them official, perhaps a hat or a map of the place you’re going to pray through. It’s hard to tell because different people have different definitions of what a prayer walk includes, but for some people it includes what is known as a “vacation.”

I say that because someone I know went on a mission trip prayer walk in Rome, Italy. Before you send in your support money and offer up a hedge of protection for them, let me first and foremost say that fear not, they returned safely months ago.

That’s the kind of mission trip that makes me a little cynical. When I hear about trips like that, the grumpy old man inside me kicks over the rocking chair on his metaphorical front porch and wants to ghost ride his rascal scooter off a cliff after using some World War II era profanities at some neighborhood street youths.

But who am I to judge when a prayer walk is a mission trip and when it’s just a nice chance to walk through an amazing city while also occasionally praying when you’re not buying fine leather belts? It’s not like there’s a helpful questionnaire that allows you to determine if someone is a missionary or a vacationary …

Missionary or Vacationary?

1. Where are you going?
A. To a country that last saw a tourist in 1987.
B. To a country that people regularly honeymoon in, retire in or go on “shell collecting excursions” in.

2. How many personal suitcases are you bringing?
A. The entire team is sharing one so I’ll be required to wear all the clothes I want to bring on the plane. I’ll have five pairs of pants on at once.
B. Whichever matching set I feel best complements the native flora and fauna.

3. How many bathing suits are you packing?
A. None, there’s not an ocean or there won’t be any time to swim.
B. As many as I can fit in my suitcases.

4. How many shots do you have to get beforehand?
A. At least 14.
B. Ouchie, no thanks.

5. If you’ll be doing a prayer walk, where will you be walking?
A. Through the Kibera slums in Kenya.
B. By the Pantheon, the Trevi fountain and hopefully the Sistine Chapel. Fingers crossed!

6. What’s your greatest worry about the trip?
A. I can’t pick just one. Probably malaria or that civil unrest would break out with a government coup started inevitably by a General that has a really thick mustache.
B. Wicked bad sunburn from not getting enough of a base tan before we leave.

7. Can you drink the water?
A. No. If we boil it and then run it through a filter system and then dissolve these charcoal tablets in it we can use it to wash our hands. But drink? No.
B. Yes, and it will be sparkling. Probably Pellegrino if I had to guess.

8. What will the reaction of friends and family members be when you get back?
A. “I’m so glad you made it home safely!”
B. “Did you get me a souvenir? Did you remember I am a size medium t-shirt?”

9. If you post photos of the trip on Facebook, what will people write in the comments?
A. “I prayed for your safety! Are you sure you should be posting photos that mention the location like that? I thought that country had serious issues with Christians being there?”
B. “I love that place! We’re going next summer for vacation! Staying at a Sandals!”

10. Did anything about the trip leave an impression on you?
A. “Yes, a small knife that a thug used to cut my fanny pack off left a scar on my lower back. I will never forget that.”
B. “Yes, the food. I ate a piece of caper glazed sea bass that danced on my tongue like Michael Flatley, the Lord of the Dance.”

If you answered A to the majority of those questions, then congratulations, you’re a prayer walking missionary. My younger brother for instance goes on regular prayer walks through the neighborhood he and his wife live in East Nashville. They pick up trash along the way and given the homicides and gang violence are prayed up long before they walk out their front door. If you answered B to the majority of those questions however, then congratulations you’re a prayer walking vacationary.

Please just know that if you send me a support letter I am going to call your “if you can’t give money, please just give prayers” bluff and send you back many, many prayers. I’ll save some for me too though because I am sinning in my heart right this second and am clearly struggling with an amount of judgmentalism that makes your vacationary plans pale in comparison to my own nonsense.

I’ve prayed before while walking but I’ve never been on an official “prayer walk.” I’m not sure what exactly makes them official, perhaps a hat or a map of the place you’re going to pray through. It’s hard to tell because people have different definitions of what a prayer walk includes, but for some people it includes what is known as a “vacation.”

I say that because someone I know went on a mission trip prayer walk in Rome, Italy. Before you send in your support letters and offer up a hedge of protection for them, let me first and foremost say that fear not, they returned safely months ago.

That’s the kind of mission trip that makes me a little cynical. When I hear about trips like that, the grumpy old man inside me kicks over the rocking chair on his metaphorical front porch and wants to ghost ride his rascal scooter off a cliff after using some World War II era profanities at some neighborhood street youths.

But who am I to judge when a prayer walk is a mission trip and when it’s just a nice chance to walk through an amazing city while also occasionally praying when you’re not buying fine leather belts? It’s not like there’s a helpful questionnaire that allows you to determine if someone is a missionary or a vacationary …

Read more after the jump (more…)

How do you laugh about faith without punching Christianity in the face?

That’s the question I’ll be asking in a lab I’m doing this year for the National Youth Workers Convention.

This is my first time at the convention and the speakers page looks like a list of my favorite people. The convention has some great speakers (Andy Stanley, Donald Miller, Francis Chan, etc.) and some awesome music, (David Crowder Band, Shane and Shane, etc.).

I’m really excited for the opportunity to laugh and have some fun in the name of faith with a bunch of youth workers.

If you’re going to be in Los Angeles, Cincinnati or Atlanta stop by the conference and say hey.

Here are the dates:
LA – September 25-28
Cincinnati – October 30 – November 2
Atlanta – November 20-23

Here’s the link to the National Youth Workers Convention. If you do decide to go, please let them know I told you to so that I’ll be able to tell if I’ve encouraged more people to attend than Francis Chan. He said he would bring in more people than me, what with his book that’s sold 200,000 copies and mine that’s currently sold 0. He said he would pack out his “big room” speaking session and that my lab would be sparsely attended. I said “You’re crazy Chan.” And he responded “Crazy like God’s love?” Touché imaginary Francis Chan I’m talking with in my head, touché.

The contest is closed. Thanks so much for the great comments. I’ll have the winner posted next week.

Ben Arment doesn’t do small things. So when it came to his conference Story, which is in Chicago on October 28 & 29, he asked if he could give away a big prize to one lucky reader from Stuff Christians Like.

The answer to that question is always yes.

So in celebration of what I honestly feel is going to be a radically intimate, courageously creative conference with Donald Miller, Mike Foster, Michael Hyatt and many others the day after Cultivate 09, Ben put together this insane box o’stuff to give away on Stuff Christians Like.

The winner will receive:

1. A Snuggie – the blanket with arms that kind of spoons you when you wear it.
2. Razzles – the treat that is both a candy and a gum
3. Skittles – good for eating and for throwing at people that are not listening to a sermon
4. The book, “unChristian” by Gabe Lyons and David Kinnaman.
5. The book, “The War of Art” by Steven Pressfield (one of my top 3 favorite books ever)
6. The book, “The Divine Commodity” by Skye Jethani
7. The book, “Gifted to Lead” by Nancy Beach
8. The book, “The Monkey and the Fish” by Dave Gibbons
9. A pre-release copy of Mitch Albom’s new book, Have a Little Faith(Tuesday’s with Morrie guy)

That is one ridiculously awesome collection of prizes and the conference is going to be equally as fantastic. (Click here to register more for Story.)

So how do you win the prize?

Help SCL remix the Metrosexual Worship Leader post.

It needs to be updated. I wrote it 14 months ago and styles have changed, hair gelling techniques have evolved, jeans have gotten more embellished, tighter and expensive.

Click here to check out the original post. Then leave a comment on this post with something that would fit on a new metrosexual worship leader scorecard.

For example:

1. Wears a suit coat vest that kind of looks like he mugged a skinny banker on the way to church. = +2 points

And maybe metro isn’t even the thing anymore. Maybe you live somewhere so hip worship leaders are wearing random things like wrestling shoes and the headgear I had as a teenager when my teeth were all bogus and left turned.

If you were going to create the ultimate modern worship leader stereotype what would you include? (Can be a guy or girl worship leader)

That’s the question. Let’s comment for a week (until August 29th) and then I’ll pick one lucky winner.

So what’s your answer to the question:

If you were going to create the ultimate modern worship leader stereotype what would you include?