You do address one aspect of accountability.

However the other side of accountability is finding a person worthy of entrusting with this journey. Many people will SAY that they will partner with you too only shrink away from speaking real truth.

Even when I spoke with my pastor about him holding me accountable he was a bit circumspect. Over the years many people have asked him the same question to only get offended and leave the church when he actually did it.

The third side (and I believe most important) of accountability is requiring yourself to be transparent. Too actually take action on those observations made by your accountability partner.

If you don’t get by the “Thank you, I will prayerfully consider what you’ve said” Christianese speak it will all be in vein.

Lauren, it's too easy to get caught up in failure worries. Two things: You can't let God down, because you weren't holding Him up in the first place. And looking at your failure takes your eyes off of God. The most important thing in all of life is to look at God and enjoy who He is. If your sin looks too big, then that means that Jesus had to be that much bigger in order to cover it all (because we know He did)! So when Satan starts convincing you that failure is worth worrying about, just take a minute to think about how big and awesome and merciful and gracious and totally cool God had to be to cover all that sin. And if that starts to work, just remember that He had to cover my sin too and He'll get even more glorious.

In His image,
Matt <><

This post particularly had me thinking because I have a few accountability partners (one general, a couple for specific issues) and your description of uphill and downhill escape routes is making think how I can make those relationships more effective.

I’ve seen that some of the other posters give suggestions, so I thought it would not be bad to pipe in with this one. Could you do a post on sexual fantasies? I’ve seen you’ve done one on porn which is really good. However, fantasies are a little different because there is no outside stimulus it happens in your brain and if you have the continual dialogue going on in your brain it’s an even harder issue to deal with. I think it would be great if maybe you had any insight on it and also how it effects girls as well as guys. People assume most guys fantasize, but girls do too, but we can’t/are expected not talk about it as much.

I hope this is not too serious a topic to talk about.

~L

I also wanted to say something about saying to God “I’ve got this one”…
So lately I’ve been struggling with already thinking that I’m going to fail at overcoming something and expecting to fail, so naturally I fail. And I don’t even feel like I give God a chance to take care of things. And I don’t really know how to stop doing that. I feel like I have let God down in this way but other people have said He sees it differently. What do you guys think?

Seems I get into trouble every time I try to communicate honestly with another person…

It’s good to be reminded that we’re weak and prone to sin. Our will to resist temptation is insufficient, and if we try to overcome the idols in our lives on our own, we’ll ultimately fail. We need the help of the Holy Spirit to help us conquer the sin in our lives.

You said “I have an accountability program on my computer, but I have figured out how to get around it. I don’t really know what to do now.”

My suggestion is to get rid of your internet for awhile. Having access can be like an alcoholic that is trying to get sober, but continues to go to the bar ‘just to see my friends’ and then wonders why they are still drinking.

If you just read that and the excuses start flooding in your mind like “I need it for”:
work
school
Facebook
research
Online banking

then I would do it immediately!!

Jason
TransparentChristianMagazine.com