One time my middle brother decided to avoid eye contact. When my father got up to read the announcments he made it all the way through and then employed his “Principal’s Voice”. Normally a baritone, “And don’t forget the Men’s Breakfast at Denny’s this Saturday at 6am.”, he dropped to a bass at the end of the announcments and finished with, “Bryan….you will need to meet me outside. NOW.”

My brother was too shocked to move faster than my dad who was already out from behind the pulpit and headed his was. My dad “helped” him out of the pew and I don’t think his feet touched the ground the whole way down the asile.

My best friend tells me that when she and her 4 siblings were acting out in church (they always sat with their parents), her big, red-haired father would lean over and ask “do you want me to take you downstairs?”. She says she didn’t know what was down there but knew she didn’t want to go there with him when he was angry!

Between my friend and I we have six kids (her- 4, me- 2) and they’re near the same ages. We would let them sit in the row ahead of us four adults. When the offending child was not in front of the appropriate parent, the wife of the other couple would administer the “slap up the back of the head” or the “straight-jointed finger poke” to the shoulder blade. Usually quiet ensued. Once they were old enough to start sitting with their friends, all four of us adults were in the choir. There have been MANY a choir glare from the four of us to the six of them, and sometimes not just parent to child– sometimes friend to friend’s child. But they work!

That was a quote from “The Last Dragon!” Awesome!