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333. "Mayer" Christianity

Bible/ Music/ pop culture July 8, 2008 • Comments

I like John Mayer. I enjoy his music and think that his song “3 x 5s” is one of my favorite songs of all time. He’s a good writer and his viral videos are solid, once inspiring my younger brother to remark, “I think I like John Mayer’s comedy more than his music.” But all that admiration aside, I think in some ways, John Mayer has snuck inside the Christian circle like a ninja. Or maybe we smuggled him in, I’m not sure. The point is, he’s here, and Christians have embraced him in a surprising way. A few weeks ago, they performed “Say” at church. I know the guitar dude I wrote about yesterday is prone to singing “Your Body is a Wonderland” and I’ve heard people at church discuss the merits of his song “Clarity.”

Am I wrong about Mayer and Christianity? Maybe but I think that like most Christian arguments we should decide this in the form of a game. Below are 15 quotes. Some are from John Mayer songs. Some are from the Message version of the Bible. See if you can guess which is which:

1. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
Then they get in all their shopping sprees. At day’s end I’m ready for sound sleep,

2. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
Belief is a beautiful armor, but makes for the heaviest sword

3. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
Now we see everything that’s going wrong, with the world and those who lead it

4. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
I dare to believe that the luckless will get lucky someday.

5. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
She takes you in with your crying eyes, then all at once you have to say goodbye

6. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
You should have seen that sunrise with your own eyes, it brought me back to life

7. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
I’m tired of all this—so tired. My bed has been floating … on the flood of my tears.

8. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
Take all your wasted honor, every little past frustration, take all of your so called problems, better put them in quotations.

9. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
She says the bible is all that she reads and prefers that I not use profanity

10. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
And I will walk outside on my own into the light, the kind of clarity that only comes to me on Sunday’s shine, Sunday’s shine

11. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
I’ve thrown myself headlong into your arms— I’m celebrating your rescue.

12. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
He comes up empty. A string of zeros.

13. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
Someday I’ll fly, someday I’ll soar

14. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
Nightly he strolls in our garden, delighting in the flowers, until dawn breathes its light and night slips away

15. Is this passage John Mayer or the Message Bible?
You tell me where to go and though I might leave to find it, I’ll never let your head hit the bed without my hand behind it

How did you do? Did you score a perfect 15 for 15? Find the answers here and thanks to Kevin, for the Biblical references.
p.s. I changed the title of this post because my friend Jordan came up with it and I thought it was really funny. I love the ideas the readers send me. Honestly, you crack me up.