Come on, how many of you have done that? You watch porn, you build up a library of DVDs or video files on your computer (or at the very least, bookmarks to various illicit websites), and then you have a paroxysm of guilt, destroy all of it, swear never to watch it again … and then eventually build up a new one. And so the cycle continues!

Of course, I say this as someone who sees "porn addiction" in much the same vein as alcohol addiction. It is POSSIBLE to use this stuff in moderation without harming anyone. Sure, an alcoholic can destroy lives and a maladjusted porn addict can destroy lives, but that doesn't mean the alcohol itself, or the porn itself, is necessarily evil. The real harm from porn is not the porn itself; it's husbands and wives lying to each other about it. If the two of you watch porn together, what's the harm?

Don't talk to me about child abuse or women being beaten: I'm talking about well-regulated legal porn, not that sick underground stuff. And don't talk to me about "objectification" either; Cosmopolitan Magazine objectifies women as much as porn does (in fact, you are far more likely to see a woman 15 lbs overweight in porn than in Cosmo, since porn is surprisingly open-minded about body types). And don't talk to me about "degrading" porn; not all porn is like that, and I can choose to watch the good stuff. It's not as if the bad stuff floods into your house against your will once you start watching the good stuff.

Good porn is usually light-hearted and comedic in nature, because let's face it (and this is something Christians don't want to accept), sex is funny. It's a funny subject (which is why stand-up comedians use it for so much of their material), and come on, you know you look ridiculous when you're doing it. The one time in his life that a man will look most like a monkey is when he's "making love" to his wife.

Of course, you might argue that it's a form of mental infidelity, but that's not necessarily the case either. My wife and I just use it to get in the mood; after the first 5 minutes we're not even looking at the screen any more. The fact is that while it sounds good to say "you shouldn't need that", just TRY to fast-switch from dishes, laundry, and helping the kids with homework to thinking sexy thoughts in 5 minutes so you can knock one off with your wife before you have to put the kids to bed. It's almost impossible, which is why so many couples' sex lives wither when they have young children. What's wrong with using something like that to generate mood? It doesn't mean you're actually fantasizing about being with those people; to be honest, I wouldn't touch them with a ten foot pole. It's just a mood enhancer.

There would probably be a lot fewer "porn addicts" if society taught them how to use it in a moderated and healthy way, rather than forcing them to skulk about in shadows and shame. The judgemental types may think they're helping, but they're actually hurting.

For all those who need help with breaking sexual addiction, try googling seeting captives free. It is a free online course and it works.

What would be even better is if they took the time to read it too.

I don’t think there is a man alive in our western society that isn’t addicted to porn, even the casual users [I say addiction because if you ask the average guy to try and masturbate without porn, he simply can't do it for even a week.] it’s depressing and disheartening, but it’s always comforting to see guys who really understand just how evil porn really is and are doing their best to change it, and in doing so, may help others not aware of the danger to do so too.