I don’t know what my blog is about yet. I’ve been writing it for over a year now, and the ideas haven’t jelled into a cohesive theme. How do I know this?
Because I can’t explain it in 30 words or less.
I was reminded of this dilemma recently when I found the brilliant blog “Pocket-Sized Stories.” What’s that blog about?
Allow me to share the first 30 words you see at the top of it:
Mad at someone you’re following on Twitter? They tweeted too many times? Or maybe said something you weren’t happy about, or tweeted a link to a blog post too often for your taste?
Here are the 3 things you should do immediately:
The other day someone told me I wasn’t using Twitter the “right way.”
A few days after that, someone told me I wasn’t using Pinterest the “right way.”
A few days after that, someone told me I wasn’t using Instagram the “right way.”
The funny thing is they’re all wrong.
Recently, I read an article where comedian Louis CK told comedians how to handle online criticism.
Part of the problem, he said, was that “comedians can’t take criticism.” I think he was right, but I think it’s more than just comedians who can’t take criticism. I think most humans can’t take criticism. Especially online.
So here’s Louis CK’s simple advice to comedians (and me and maybe you) for handling online haters.
“If you don’t like the person, stop googling yourself every ten seconds. Cause nobody’s making you read it.”
That is perfect.
The best way to handle online haters?
Don’t.
If you ignore haters and don’t go looking for it, you’ll be surprised how very little of it finds you.
Question:
Have you ever googled yourself? (I’ll go first. I have, a lot. And the results very rarely made me feel better.)
I have a 6-year-old daughter and a 9-year-old daughter.
A few weeks ago, they grabbed my iPhone, took a photo, and then added cats to that photo.
This is what kids do. They add cats to photos.
I then posted that photo on Instagram. It was a funny photo. I’m a dad who loves sharing how awesome my kids are. End of story.
Next morning, L.E. comes downstairs. I tell her I posted the photo.
Her first response was, “How many likes did it get?”
That is why my kids won’t use social media any time soon.
She’s 9.
She doesn’t need to be worrying about how many “likes” something she created got.
I’m 36. I’ve been to college. I’ve worked at a lot of companies. I’ve purchased a house, done my taxes and a lot of the other things you do as an adult and, even so, I have a hard time handling “likes.”
I don’t want to add that to her tiny self-esteem.
When I was in the seventh grade, a guy named Dan Smith laughed at me in the courtyard before school started. He didn’t like the shirt I was wearing. He got other people to laugh. I didn’t feel like I had a whole lot of “likes” in that moment.
But I couldn’t measure them. I didn’t count them. Other people weren’t about to see how low I was on “likes” in that moment, but with social media you can.
I don’t know how old your kids should be before you let them use social media. If you’re a parent and your kids have Instagram, Facebook or Twitter, please don’t think I’m judging your decision.
The title of this post is “Why my kids won’t use social media any time soon,” not “Why your kids shouldn’t use social media any time soon.”
I don’t have the answer for your family. I honestly don’t have it all figured out and will make countless mistakes along the way.
What I do have, though, is a recent realization that as a dad, I want to do everything I can to protect my kids from anything that will force their hearts to ask, “How many likes did I get?”
It is.
You’re right.
Pinterest is just for girls.
Is it the third most popular social media network in the world? Sure, but you would hate it guys. It’s all photos of knitting and gluten-free cupcake pops and kittens who have locally sourced cotton sweaters on.
Stay off of Pinterest. In fact, if you could stay off it for the next 6-12 months that would be incredibly helpful to me.
Whatever you do, please promise me you won’t talk to my author friends who told me two years ago that “blogging is silly and not worth my time.”
This is going to be short because there are already a bunch of words on the Internet.
If you want to win on Instagram, there’s a one-second trick that anyone on the planet can do. Ready?
From now on, when people I’m having a conversation with get lost in their iPhone instead of talking to me, I’m going to handle things Pandora style.
I’m going to stop talking.
Wait until they realize I have.
And then hold up a small sign that says, “Are you still listening?”
You with me?
Because there’s not a precedent.
We are the guinea pigs.
We are the first generation of parents in the history of mankind that has to have a digital footprint conversation with our kids.
Your parents didn’t need to do that. Your parents’ parents didn’t need to do that. Your parents’ parents’ parents were trapping muskrats for their pelts.
You will go first. I will go first. My wife will go first. That is a lot of responsibility, and that’s why we’ve already started figuring out some very deliberate social media lessons for our six-year-old and eight-year-old.
Is that too early to have that discussion? Nope. Because the world starts talking far earlier to your kids than that. And it’s not a question of whether they will learn to navigate the potentially awesome, potentially dangerous world of social media.
They will. When you refuse to address something with your kids, it doesn’t mean it won’t get addressed. It just means it won’t get addressed by you. The world is more than happy to fill the void your absence creates.
There is a tremendous responsibility in setting precedent, but there is also tremendous fun. We get to be the pioneers! We get to set the pace! We get to go first!
The next generation of parents will learn from us how to teach kids about social media. My hope is that we will leave them a legacy of directions to follow, not a history of disasters to avoid.
Question:
Do you have any rules about social media with your kids?
For the last week, we’ve been talking about the 5 C’s of social media. We covered “Content, Context, Clarity and Consistency.” Today it’s time to talk about the final C:
5. Community.
In order to build a community, you have to decide which type of approach to social media you are going to take. And there are basically only three approaches: